Death is Not Defeat

Jezebel
6 min readAug 24, 2020

My suicide anniversary

Photo by Chris Curry on Unsplash

You know me as sexual Jezebel! But I have a checkered past over the past year! Yes, I am reaping the benefits of writing for Medium and honing my craft as a newbie in this forum, but I was in a very dark place a year ago!

On 8/29/19, I took 60 prescription pills and a bottle of wine intentionally.

There are five factors that brought me to this date;1. going through a divorce and having your partner of 31 plus years denigrate and subjugate your existence with your adult children. 2. Older son does not want a relationship with me, his mother, after she left his father, 20 months ago, stil heart broken! 3. One of twin daughters still judges her mother since divorce. 4. Sexually abused by boss in his office. 5. finances run amuck, and loneliness! Seems simple right??

NO!

My life got harder after my said suicide! After I drank my concoction that day, the two guys I was dating simultaneously, called EMS and the police. The rest is my story!

Seven police officers arrived at my door that day while I lay waiting for death! I was pissed at both my lovers for calling EMS…I really wanted to die! I planned it meticulously and had left 7 letters for my loved ones and workmates.

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Jezebel
Jezebel

Written by Jezebel

Jezebel is a psychotherapist who lives and works passionately. Life is a journey worth sharing our musings for others to enjoy.

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